之。洒

怎么说？似乎很少向人提起过。
因为，很多人都质疑、很多人都反对。
没得到认可，我还是继续，我还是坚持。
我觉得不需要跟任何人解释或说明什么。
多余。

有多在乎
有多喜欢
有多爱

我自己知道就好了。
不在乎别人的想法。
太多人、太多想法，
我满足不了所有人。
只能依自己的感觉、观察来做决定，
所以随时都准备着承担任何结果。

从中，得到了
快乐、
惊喜、
感动、
开心、
满足、
幸福、
疑惑、
焦虑、
失望、
伤心。

什么感觉都尝尽了。

所有关于你的事，
时常不经意地牵动着我的思想、我的心。
确定自己已不会再动摇时，
那感觉却又再让我质疑自己。
一次又一次地。

它不频繁、
可却深刻。

几天一次
几个月一次
半年一次
一年一次

只觉得自己很逊。
觉得自己像智障。
控制不到自己。

我太爱留恋从前。
我不能了，
真的不能再这样。
这一切也只是个经过。
一切都变了，

在爱的世界里，没有谁对不起谁，只有谁不懂得珍惜谁。
在流泪的时候觉得委屈，其实心里已经慢慢学会坚强。

两面性的射手有着过客般的忧伤。
习惯了把脆弱的一面藏到心里，
不希望给其他人带来不愉快。
遇到无法负荷的情绪外泄，
让身边的人不知所措、
不懂得如何安慰我，
并不是我想要的。

很抱歉。
牵累到你们。
我知道，
每个人心中都有个害怕被触碰到的地方。

当看到沮丧的射手时，
其实，你们不必说什么、
不必做什么，
因为射手自愈能力超快超强。
（胜过X战警的金刚狼）
静下心来，
就能把自己的烦恼都消除掉。
所以你们根本不需担心这个射手，
因为他真的很强，
他有时只是装傻装弱罢了。

从身边的朋友得到的：

过去了就再也追不回
所以从这一刻开始
要比昨天更爱自己
更会照顾自己
更会珍惜现在的每一分每一秒

谢谢你们！

洒脱地
走出阴霾、
逐渐进化。

~之进化。洒脱射手

梁。我

~梁心頤Lara。我沒有

怎麼說

你曾經也有送花給我

說你愛我比愛自己更多

我笑了 我愛了

。

那時候

我把你的花收藏在胸口

以為這樣能保存

現在我懂了 愛會褪色

。

你是否還會想到我

是否也會這樣寂寞

是不是有牽別的手

我沒有 我沒有

。

這麼說

說你愛我也只是個經過

心像風吹過的季節轉動

安靜了 改變了

。

ㄧ年後

遇見你我能夠貼上笑容

多麼小心的難過

發抖的嘴唇

不敢過問

。

你是否還會想到我

是否也會這樣寂寞

是不是有牽別的手

我沒有 我沒有

之。幸

搬家差不多一星期了。

很多东西暂时都还不稳定，
还有许多事需要安排和调整。

我很喜欢这个新家、
这里的朋友。

在这里很自在、舒服……

满足、开心、幸福~ v^^



~之家。幸运射手

miscellaneous uno

This weekend moving out!
Feel like i am a bird out of cage!

Excited~

Long time no shooting~
Long time no blogging~

What am i busy on?

Not sure...
Time flies like rocket.
Before i realise what i have did,
a day passed. *sigh*

October and November's weekends are fulled.
Hmmm... i need some leisure time~
Most preferred spending time with family.

Will you feel i am old thinking girl cause i always think of want to be with my family?
I don't know why.
That makes me an "aeroplane queen" in my buddies eyes.

I know they will understand me.
Buddies know it.

Besides, for buddies, we don't need to meet all the time
but once we meet,
it will be nonstop chatting, fooling and bla bla bla.

That's what buddy we call huh?

Well, I really love all of you so much so much.

Take care everyone! Appreciate all the precious moments in your life!

"Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams." -- Ashley Smith

We need a Superman

It just happened, right infront of my eyes.

I was shocked.
I was scared.
My instinct just told me to run away.

It was raining.

On the way from lrt station to company,
there was this guy being robbed.

It happened so fast.
There was nothing that i can do for him.

Right infront of my eyes, a gang of malay guys surrounded him.
Forced him to the side of the shops.
One of them grabbed his neck,
a few of them hold his hand,
a few of them searched his body for wallet.

He was shouting," Tolong! Tolong! "

There was a woman infront of me,
both of us look at the guy and we didn't lend any helping hand.
Both of us walked away hurriedly, leaving him there.

I felt sorry for him.
I can't do anything for him.
I felt i'm so weak.
I'm scared that i will be the next victim.

I hope they just grabbed his wallet and didn't stab him or hurt him.
The voice of the man shouting," Tolong! Tolong! " keep repeating in my mind.
It sounds so helpless.

Can we have a superman in this world?

“Pictures help you to form the mental mold”

Lately I was frenzy on photo stuff.
Well, I am not a pro in photography but I love to snap pictures to .
To me, it isn’t about snapping the most beautiful picture.
In fact, I think there is no such thing as the most beautiful picture.
Different picture has its own special feel.
“Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.”
Just hold up your camera and you will be surprised with what you’ve snapped.

There’s an awful lot you could tell about a person by their pictures: where they’ve been, what they’ve seen.



When we look back on our younger years, we will remember the people who went to school with us, the people who made us laugh, the people who hung out with us when nobody else would, and the people who made our lives much better simply by being a part of it.



Grandpa, grandma, long lost cousins… I thought of you all when I saw this picture.



I sure wish you all are with me at that moment.





Good friends are like stars....
You don't always see them, but you know they are always there.


There may be somebody who is thinking about you RIGHT NOW and wishing that you were around. That's the wonderful thing about friendship-you always feel loved and cared about.


So, who is the somebody in your mind right now?




Sometimes , we all do things, just make no sense.








Capturing that scene at that particular moment with that particular feeling, makes the picture a special and unique one.



No second picture can deliver the same feeling as it is.



A simple picture can lead me to a story, a feeling.


Have you watch the movie Artificial Intelligence: A.I. before?

This picture leads my mind to the story. David (an advanced humanoid robot which are capable of emulating thoughts and emotions) and Teddy (a wise, robotic teddy bear (Supertoy)) take the submersible to the fairy, which turns out to be a statue from a submerged attraction at Coney Island. Teddy and David are trapped when the Wonder Wheel falls on their vehicle. Believing the Blue Fairy to be real, he asks to be turned into a real boy, repeating his wish without end, until the ocean freezes.


Only that David is now the electronic giraffe tang lung and Blue Fairy is the candle light.

Dedicate this to my dearest friend, wearnzki. Quoted it from my favorite movie: Forrest Gump.

“Don’t ever let anybody tell you they’re better than you, Forrest.
If God intended everybody to be the same, he’d given us all braces on our legs.”

Peace yo!

"Pictures help you to form the mental mold" -Robert Collier

蓝。迎

小孩子在接受惩罚时，通常都会大哭一场。
可是，
知道自己做错事的小孩子，
他们在受刑时，
通常都不会落泪。

“我不是那块料！”
“这不是我能发光的地方，这不是我的舞台。”

辗转在床上，思绪无法平静。






蓝色风暴里，
狂奔中的乱流，
失落的心情，
落不出的雨滴。

意志消沉，提不起劲，自甘堕落的灰败。

天昏地暗，
深灰色的射手，
因受挫而毫无斗志。
弓、箭都发挥不出作用。
只因，
射手心不在焉，
缺乏自信，
完全无法专注。

控制不住的颤抖，
即使目标近在眼前，
也没能箭中红心。

舞台上，
射手一直挣扎着。

失败
无助
彷徨
失落
沮丧
自责

舍弃刚站上的舞台，
射手心有不甘。

在苍茫的月光下，
倔强的射手拾起弓箭，
面对浩劫、展开战斗，
消灭、摧毁。

觉醒
实践
突破

屡败屡战
打落牙齿和血吞

洪荒战场，
独剩灰烬。

*把失败当礼物，把痛苦当老师*
感激台下观众，把阳光注入这场暴雨。
*积极、用功、认真、敬业*

不是能力的问题，而是态度的问题。
激发勇气，不丧失信心，拥抱阳光和微笑！

~蓝色风暴。迎向

It can be done. If you want it.

Today i documented my yoyo cici msn shorcut and its url.

Then i gave it to Wearn, Den, and Jiet.

Wearn and Den asked me the same question.
"How long did you take to do this?"

Just a couple of hours.

This leads to a thought in my mind.

If i want to do it, i can make it.

Sometimes, when i can't do something, it is not because i am not capable of.
It is because the desire of achieving it isn't that much.


"Success means having the courage, the determination, and the will to become the person you believe you were meant to be." - George Sheehan


yoyo cici - my inspirations

~ 咱們的心声。。 fresh graduates feeling ~

5th August 2010, I graduated with Bachelor of Applied Science (Honours) majoring in Mathematical Modelling.
It is time to say goodbye to the comfortable and secure life within school walls.

Some of my friends chose to further study.
Some already started to work.
Some are still figuring their career path.

The uncertainty of the future really makes us lost of direction.

Too many paths to choose. Too many advices to listen to. Too many worries to keep in mind.

During this time, most of us, especially those who looking for job, are under pressure, feel lack of confident, confusing in making choices, feel so down and low, doubted with their own decisions.

What if I fail in the career I chose?
What if my decision leads me to a dead end?
What if I can’t manage to do my job well?
What if I don’t like my job or choices I made?

Indeed, there are too many worries…

For all those “what if”, my answer will be:

Do what you believe in, and go after your dreams.
Any choice u want to make, consider it well then step out and give your best shot!

Accept the failure.
If things goes wrong or bad, if it doesn’t work as what we imagined, then accept it.
Take up the responsible of making the wrong choices.
错误。这是年轻人的专利。最伟大的成就不是从没经历过跌倒，而是在跌倒之后再度站起来。

It is better to do something than worrying or thinking what the best is. While you are still worrying, the chance may just slip through. So, be brave to make choices.

Be flexible.
Ready to face changes every second.
Do not limit yourself.

Before I went to KL to work, dad told me this:
“If you cannot manage to do your job, felt unhappy or stress with your job or you don’t like your job, we can pay back the money to the company. You don’t need to force yourself to do it. There are many choices in this world.”

I was very touched to hear it.
Every time I think of his speech, I felt like crying.
I am so glad my dad put my feelings at first place rather than the money.

Since I am a grown-up, I learnt that there are many things that we don’t like to do it but yet we have to do it. I never list my current job as “forever”. In the future, I may step into other field as well. However, for current state, I want to do the best of me in this job.

“Don’t worry dad. I will try my best. I believe I can handle it.”
I will live the best out of me. Love you all always~

“To do a common thing, uncommonly well, brings success.” — Henry John Heinz

Magnificent and Delightful Gift

McD Sundae Cone



what i felt from it: -



sweet + soft + cold



warm + nostalgia + serenity + cool



a feeling of appreciation ~



calmed agitations of the soul~



ღ i love it ღ

什？细

我有个朋友说
其实，做女生很好
因为，若 一个女生对一个男生表白
成功率都很高

事实的确实如此吗
其实不然

试想想
除非那男生真的很缺乏爱
若那男生身边有着无数朵艳花让他选择
你还能百分百确定你能赢得他的青睐吗？


爱情时常让人摸不着头脑
选择开始爱，就像选择开始一场游戏
这场游戏，只有两个人玩
而让游戏者退出的原因
有千百万种
只要游戏规则被破坏了或某一方玩腻了
那么就是GAME OVER 了

有些人
恋爱的时候 ， 就像 ，与世隔绝般

有些人
只要一谈起恋爱，就变成无所不能的救世主
不论爱人提出什么要求，都会义无反顾的替对方实现梦想

有些人
即使知道爱人说的是谎言，都会选择相信

有些人
沉溺爱情，即使痛苦也会觉得甘愿

爱情
就像变身灵药
陷入其中的人
都会自动变身

爱情
也可以是一种伤害
残忍的人，选择伤害别人
善良的人，选择伤害自己

爱情
可以是那么短
遗忘却那么长

爱情
在飞逝的时间下
可以被了解
可以被证明
也可以被推翻

爱情
是两个人
时常想
握住彼此的手




如果你正在恋爱，请不要毫无保留地付出
无论什么时候，看清楚你自己手中留着什么底牌

男（女）朋友，宁缺毋滥
不要因为寂寞而恋爱，不要因为跟风而恋爱

情伤时，我们都无法责怪爱情伤害了我们
因为一开始的时候是谁点头答应爱情的来临 ？
选择爱，就要准备接受爱情的一切
酸甜苦辣

一个人好与坏
不是看他花心还是专一
而是要看
他有没有 控制力

爱情本来就是两个人的世界，没有多一个人的位子
全身心的付出总是得不到相应的回报
曾经的海誓山盟总是被冰冷的现实砸得粉碎
如果百感委屈仍不能求全，如果呼喊了千万遍依然得不到回应
那么聪明的你应知道，是该走的时候了

爱情不是空气和水，没有了就不能够生存
所以不需要抛弃了自尊丢了原则去维持

不舍得？
什么是舍得？
先舍再得
有舍才有得
因为失去，你会知道
遇见一个对的人，有多么难

当眼泪流下来
才知道
分开也是一种明白

不管你爱过多少人
不管你爱得多么痛苦或快乐
最后
你不是学会了怎样恋爱
而是学会了怎样去爱自己

每件事的发生
只是为了丰富你的人生经验
相信生活和时间
时间冲淡一切苦痛，生活说不定创造更新的喜悦
感谢所有伤害过你的人
对他们挥挥手，说声，我不再恨你们了

被甩是悲伤的事，但更悲伤的是没有把自己的心意正确的表达出
把你的真心表达出来，真心对他（她），这样就够了

爱与不爱？
人永远是寂寞而自我的生物
无论多么真诚的说出自己的爱 ， 也总会有无法被理解的心情

爱情
需要被寻找

请相信
美好的爱情
还是会出现

~什么是爱？细细品味

心。聆

8月6日
毕业典礼的第二天
爸爸带我去剪刘海、化妆、拍毕业照
在化妆时，他和化妆师（旧同事）谈天
和平常一样，当其他人看到我们都长大了、出来谋生了，他们就会对我爸说
你就好咯，孩子都大了，放心了、轻松了咯
通常，爸都会笑笑
有时，他会说还有个小的要担心
这一天，他说得比较多
他说
还没可以放心啊
还要看到他们真的可以自己“找吃”先

父母，都是伟大的
他们无时无刻都在为孩子操心、为孩子劳碌

我
要努力做工
要定期给家用
要他们知道，你女儿我已经可以自立了
要爸妈放心
希望哥好好打工、不要再靠父母打本做生意

在和爸选毕业照片时
突然觉得
原来
我
还是
一个小孩
尤其是在爸妈身边时

与家人在一起的感觉
温馨
回味无穷

~心中悄悄话。聆听

Working Feel

~ no life

~ dull

~ roboted

~"sienzzz"

Do i need a work life balance training?

I hope i can say something like "I love my work and i actually prefer a work day instead of off days" but the reality of work life always smash this thoughts out of my mind.

I am a ASP.NET (vb) programmer but i have no idea of these programming stuff as i am a maths student in uni. So, current stage would be LEARNING while WORKING.

Reasons for taking this job?
It is payback time for my scholarship.

My office activities?
Debug, fix, enhance, develop codes.
At intervals, surfing web, e.g. reading online news, checking mails, visiting blogs, fbing, plurking, msn-ing.

Well, in some other way, i felt glad too.

~ there's a job waiting for me after graduated, skipped the steps of jobs seeking, interviews attending, bla bla bla.
~ no office politic as everyone just dealing with the codes in their own cubes.
~ the office is cool, up to standard.
~ new laptop with a LCD monitor.
~ tons of freedom, can msn / fb /plurk / anything as long as no people is beside you especially manager.
~ no dateline for submitting the works (for now).

In conclusion, working life is a bit "sienz" but it's for living, no choice.
Every month, there is only one day that can be listed as the happiest day in my work life -paycheck receiving day. XD

Perhaps some day in future, i will be shouting to every living creature in the world, "I LOVE MY JOB AND I DON'T WANT ANY OFF DAYS!!"
Up until the day of yelling I LOVE MY JOB comes, this is my working life-pattern at this age.

。。我知道我可以_i know that i can。。

话俾自己听我係得噶。。。

俾自己相信自己咗。。。

说服自己可以做到咗。。。


但係……


真正实行嘅时候，
又是另一回事咗。

俾安抚了的心开始不安定了。

开始怀疑自己咗……

要俾自己坚守住
"If you think you can, you can" 。

喂，
梗系掂啦!
傻咗咩？
点解会想放弃？
唔駛咁驚青吖~
第日没机会嘅啦。。。

嗯。。。
相信自己得！我係得噶！

我係掂噶！
我好掂！

。。弱。。

最近身、心都退步了？

是这样吗？

又再变弱了吗？


实行
醒悟 与 改变

。。宁静中的幸福。。

喜欢现在这样。。。


喜欢这一刻。。。


和谐的气氛，
可以找回人与人之间最初的真心。


行云流水，
很美，自然流畅。


安宁的夜里，
感觉像你就在身旁支持着我。


很舒服的感觉。。。


精神上的支持原来是这样。


很好的体验。


幸福也可以很简单。

。。塔罗牌占卜。。

昨天和两个朋友去看塔罗牌占卜。
我干姐的姐姐去玩过，都说很准。
对啊，我试过了，蛮准的。

一开始，占卜师叫我洗牌。 要想着自己的名字。
过后，在整叠牌上用我的右拇指按一按。
接着，我抽出十二张牌。

一开始，我开到月亮牌。
她说，我是很多幻想的人。
很会幻想和作故事。
在朋友群里，我是扮演导演的角色而不是主角。 （ == 这时身边那两个瓜不停的点头。。。）
当我和很多朋友在一起时，我会很出色。可是，自己一个人时就没那么会表演或发挥自己了。
我是个很多东西想的人，一有事就会失眠。（干姐在身边也很同意，因为上星期我才因为失眠而半夜打给她。）
她说我喜欢有人陪伴。
来玩牌也要有人陪，去买衣也要陪，做什么都爱人陪。（对啊，可是，很多人都是爱有人陪的吧。）
说我偏食。。。 （== 哪有？不吃葱和生菜罢了嘛。。。）

在看家人怎样看待我时，我翻了一张牌。 （忘了那是什么牌了）
她说，哇！你在家人的心目中是很仙家的哦？很多东西说的哦！
家里老的，成熟的，年轻的，年幼的都跟你很好谈。
东南西北，什么话题你都有。
我在家人心目中是双面人，很多东西我都自己收起来，没告诉他们。（对啊，通常都跟朋友说的）
她说在家里，我有很多自由，时常可以出夜街，而我也不会滥用这种自由。（对噢。）

在看我怎样对待家人时，我翻到lover牌。
她说我对家人很有爱心，很关怀他们。
而且也很关心小过我的兄弟姐妹的学业。（我前几天才借了两本电脑书给在等spm成绩的堂弟呢。）
她说我在家比较开心和有多一点活动，而我在宿舍里就只是睡觉，读书。 （对哦，我在宿舍房里都是读书睡觉看电脑，其它时间都很忙，不在房里，又时常夜归。。。）

说到朋友在我心中是怎样时，我翻到emperor。
她说朋友在我心中像皇帝一样。
有聚会叫到我，我一定会到，很少会失约，除非是有事。
朋友圈子都是 educated 的。
他们有事都会找我，没事就很少。（干姐同意了。。。 XD 原来你们是这样对我的！不过我喜欢。）

在看爱情时，她一看我开的牌时就说，哇！你怎天sms的哦？？ （给她一讲就中。。。）
因为那牌里有两只鸽子。她说那代表飞鸽传书。
她说我和那个人sms时很多东西讲，可是见到面又没东西说了，继续保持现在这样就好。
如果我喜欢A，不喜欢C，最后，我和C会在一起而不是A 。
而把我和现在sms的这个人联系起来的是因为学业。（对吧？那时杰是说要问我学业的东西才向我拿电话号码的。可是，你有问过我学业上的东西吗？哈哈！）

说到学业，我的成绩都不会很差。
说我一读书就很拼命。时常默默的读到很夜，朋友都不知道。（只有室友知道吧？我都是考试前才读的噢，不过真的是读到不用睡觉那种啦。。。）
考试都会很容易过关。
她说家人都希望我会继续读书和出国读，可是我都不要。（对啊，我不喜欢读书了。）

事业上，我会是一面做工一面读书的。（我也这么觉得，因为我会不熟电脑。之前industrial training时就是这样。 ）

她说我驾车很steady的。（哈哈！我可以承认这一点吗？）
一至四月要防水，七和八月要小心驾车。

还有好多的。。。可是我想不起了。。。
其实，我应该录影那段时间的。头脑不好，好难回忆全部了。