思念

我知道伤心不能改变什么。

可是，刚才当我一关上眼睛，以前和你们生活的画面一幕幕重现。

一个人伏在桌上，边小息边思念着你们。
。
。

曾经，我把童年的故事写成英文作文。

补习老师竟然给评语说：“很好的一篇文章，可是，真的是出自你的文笔吗？”

我并没有生气，反而很开心。

因为，我的童年完美得连老师都觉得不可能。
。
。

没有机会帮你们捶背了。

没有机会和你去榴莲园喂羊了。

没有机会与你们坐在屋外看星星了。

没有机会一大清早跟着你骑摩托车去吃干捞面了。

没有机会看你表演用木棍开榴莲。

没有机会吃你煮的菜了。

没有机会告诉你们我时常都有想着你们。

没有机会在停电时出外捉很多萤火虫放在你们家了。

没有机会在你们面前胡扯一番了。

没有机会。。。
。
。

只要静静地和你们一起坐在客厅看电视，我就很开心了。

可惜，这么简单的一件事，现在却那么难达到。

不，是不可能达到。

好想和你们一起吃团圆饭。

好想好想。。。
。
。

我并不是爱贪恋过去美好的事物，忽视眼前所拥有的。

只是，突然间非常想念你们和以前所有的点点滴滴。
。
。

我会过得很好。

你们也要一样。

+...-...+...-...+ Adios amigos -...+...-...+...-

Adios...

It means goodbye in spanish.

We say goodbye when we want to leave somebody or something.

Most of the time, we will be able to see the someone or something again next time after we say goodbye to them,

but

not everytime.

Have you ever think that you will never have the chance to meet that someone or something again after you say adios to them?

Well, if everyone do think like this everytime they say goodbye, i bet this world will be a wonderful and a better one.

Everyone appreciating things they are having now.

Less crime case.

More lovers.

Less divorce.

Healthier earth.

Less wastage.



*******************************************************************


快乐时光过得真的快，又是时候说拜拜。
Happy hours passed real fast, it is time to say goodbye again.


Adios to my nike shoes.

Although you are my second pair nike but you are my first pair nike which my dad bought for me. Well, i love the tick on you. You made me feel that i am taking the right steps on my every move. You made me walk through my life confidently all the way. In fact, your aim is to train me on jogging. You did a great job. Happy retiring. I love you very much. Remembering that last time when you are almost K.O. , i sent you to ICU. I know it's pain to have needle and strings on your wound but i cannot bear to loss you. We were together for two year plus. It's not a long period but it's not a short one too. Still, our happy time ended on last saturday.


Adios to my nokia 5300.

After spend RM80 to repair you last two weeks, it's time to hand you out. Please keep all those photos in you nicely and take a look at them whenever you misses me.

Adios to my calculator.

Your service time for 4 years in my form 6 and two years plus uni life is great. Besides those extra functions you contributed to my studies, i felt great contentment to be able to create more than 10 smileys with symbols on your body.

Adios to my drumsticks + red cloth (红布).

Due to your fit and hard body, other drum sticks start to envy you already. They were unsatisfied for the unfair treat. They starts to ask for more training rather than staying inside my cupboard. So, i think it's time you retired and let them enjoy the training. My red cloth, you were able to run three rounds on my waist. I will keep fit to make sure that you can run three rounds on my waist again when you pay a visit to me in future.

Adios to my umbrella.

The natural oil-free sun milk from the Face Shop told me that finally they felt that they are playing the main role now.

Adios to my shoe bag.

Take good care of my ticky shoes. He went through operation before.

Adios to my pirated body glove bag.

Dad bought you from his friends. I likes your cool style.

Adios to my green milo tshirt.

Separating you with my bro's green milo tshirt was a big tough decision. You got to go out and see the real world. It's selfish to keep you with me and limits your view to this big interesthing world.

Adios to my short pants.

Don't worry, be happy. Mum bought you with rm5 to accompany me play badminton games. At least you been to competition before. I am sure you are proud. Of course, your value increased since that competition you went through.

Adios to my bro's ear phone.

My ears always praise you. They felt very comfortable with your service. R.I.P. Don't miss my bro.

Adios to my pencil box and all the stationaries.

To my pens, do write more meaningful things to inspire people.

Adios to my notes, timetable, charity run forms and penang international run forms.

I will see you all again soon. Due date is this week.

Adios to my friend's house keys.

You helped me gain access to their house 24/7 for some time. Pleasure to feel like i am one of the house owners. The truth is i am not. You are extra to them but not to me. Deep down in my heart, you are always important and useful.

Adios to my room keys.

I will meet up with your twin bros when the office open on monday 9am. Don't worry, i won't tell them you left them secretly.

Adios to my comb.

Went through a day without you. I think i look more cool when you are not around. My hands did a great job on my hairs.



*****************************************************************



Big applause to the people who broke my car window.

Thank you for breaking my car window and made me spend money to fix it.

Thank you for taking my school bag. I am so glad to have chance to stop reading those lecture notes. How did you know i hate study?

Thank you to bring along the shoes bag with you. How nice it is to be able to run Kebun Bunga charity run and Penang Bridge Marathon with a new pair of sport shoes. This time i sure get medals.

My old CASIO fx-350MS wants to thanks you for able to attend lectures and tutorials everyday with me again. He missed me so much. You really fulfilled his dream perfectly.

You also made me discovered that i can actually open my cupboard with a little bit of violence even though it's locked.

By overall, you did a great job and fantastic effort in helping me to clear out my things.

旧的不去，新的不来。
If old things do not leave, new things would not come.

Thanks to you, i planned some time for myself to go for shopping.

I love shopping!

Lastly, thanks for not taking my wallet away. You are so considerable. You understand well that i hates those long procedures to make a new identity card and apply another atm card again.



Adios amigos.



I will remember you all whenever i read this post .

... First War ... Last Day ...

6am, 4 September 2009

Tough times never last. Tough people do.

Last day of tough time...

for this week.

Should be thankful that i recovered in short time after falling sick when the war just started.

Should be thankful that i did not get quarantine at this "fever sensitive time".

I should improve myself.

Improve in efficiently finish my work instead of thinking when is the relaxing time gonna reach.

Stop wondering when will the tough time end.

Stop questioning why am i suffering while others are relaxing.

Stop deducing the tasks are tough.

Stop those stupid thinking.

" ... ... "

" Think creatively. Think out of the box. "

" Anyway, we shouldn't put ourselves in situation depending on people, try to solve it by our own ability. "

" Even though what you doing now may not be useful to your future job, it will somehow impress others. "

" The attitude you treating this is the attitude you gonna work in future. "

- Final Year Project supervisor/lecturer

" ... ... "

" Do more, help more and you will know more, gain more. "

" The reward may be get by other people but the true knowledge and skills is with you. "

" Try to be a busy body and do things that other do not wish to do. "

" Hardwork is the one that will bring you true and long term rewards. "

- ex partime employer

Well, every success person have their own life principles.

Reminding myself everyday,

Work hard. Work smart. Be tough not rough.

~The war has begun~

The war has begun.

War.

Why war?

After done two tests this week, more is coming on next week.


__________________________________________________________

War Schedule

Martes : Mathematical Modelling Assignment 1, Final Year Project presentation, Vector Calculus Tutorial 5

Miércoles: PERL lab assignment

Jueves: Data Analysis and Design Test 1

Viernes: Data Analysis and Design Project First Report

__________________________________________________________


With all these missions waiting to be accomplished, i accepted another extra mission from my FYP (Final Year Project) lecturer.

Modify website for SCSTW3

At first, i thought this will be a bit tough task due to the limitation knowledge that i have in website programming. (I only tried on asp.net vb so far and never touch php nor know any java) Later when i discussed with the lecturer, then only i know this is not just a bit tough. Is chiu kap super hyper sibeh tough.

Difficulties
1. Only know asp.net vb.
2. Limit time (need to upload new things by next week).
3. No source code for the created website.
4. No idea of what type of programming languages for the created website.
5. Have to study test, do assignments, prepare FYP presentation and do this website at the same time.

Difficulty level: 5 out of 5



"Wah... You think so difficult, why you still accept? So stupid... Don't let your lecturer know you minor computer science mah... Really baga."

Okay, reasons...

Reasons
1. I want to challenge myself.
2. I am trying to make my life harder and making myself into the messy, busy, going nuts condition.
3. I believe that while helping others, i am actually helping myself.
4. I want to learn more.
5. I believe i am benefited from this besides making myself more tired and restless.
6. I want to do this -> "Do not pray for an easy life. Pray to be a strong person."

That's all the details for the big war. Well, this is just the starting.

好戏在后头。
Good show is yet to come.

世上无难事，只要有心解决整件事。
There is no difficult matters in this world, as long as there's will to solve it.

Still the same, i will say : " I try my best. "
Hoping the best outcomes. =)




Next, some updates.

• Going home on Sunday night to celebrate beloved bro's birthday. Happy Birthday bro~ ^^ Wish he will improve everyday. Continue his hardwork. Gain more confident. Be more independent. Proud to have this bro.
• Starting to have interactions with him again. Hope can maintain like this. Not too over, not too less. Now is good.
• H1N1 still taking lifes (one of my coursemate's school time teacher is dead). Heard that normal masks cannot prevent it because the virus is too tiny.
• Although juniors saying my condition now is okay, still trying to reduce weight. I want to be slimmer~ ^^
• Got help from computer science friend on the extra mission ( SCSTW website ). Yippie~ It's good to have more friends in different fields. (Perhaps next topic may consider talking about friends in different field.)

*Just now accidentally press the shift key 5 times and know that will turn on StickyKeys. Hehe...

朋友。。距离。。失恋

最近有朋友失恋了。

不是第一次有朋友失恋了。

这次感觉很不同。为他们感到伤心，失落。

或许他们都是我的朋友。

或许我一直认为他们天生一对。

或许他们太突然了。

总之感觉很深就对了。

距离，真的是问题的关键吗？

不，不应该把距离当作分开的理由。

已经厌倦了，所以不爱了。

喜欢上另一个，所以要分了。

理由，可以给得直接一点吗？

心的距离远了，不管靠得多近都会有一堵墙在中间。

相隔两地的距离其实也只是借口。

唉，可惜。。。

爱情到底想怎样？

A lost soul

10.30pm, 12 July 2009

Being third year now means being super senior to first year juniors but it also means losing seniors.

The upper batch of seniors was so supportive, inspiring, heart-warming... They were like the warm shining sun and we were like the newly budding flowers.

Remembering all those events that hold us together tight.

Last time, we were in team. A team which makes me feels like a family.Our drum team. Real proud of it.

Our high spirits.
Our lost-minded actions.
Our belly laughs.
Our nervous tensions.
Our attentions raising shouts.

My liking in celebrate people's birthday, especially making surprises to them. Everytime there's a celebration, we discussed and planned for it. Today is my great partner's birthday but i can found no one to discuss on it.Texted seniors, batchmates and juniors who are still here but all were busy with their own things now. Not much of encouraging response on it. Heart-rending due to unable to prepare everything in such a short time without you all. No more excitement on preparing. Until this moment, i realized the missing of you all and deeply felt helpless. Lack of people joining leaded to postponement of celebration.

I wonder when i am going to put on a plan again for the postponed event.

Lost of courage of texting everyone.
Feel scare of getting no one to join again.
Unwilling to bear another disappointment.

Sense of lost...

Raised my memory of losing beloved grandpa and grandma.
Raised my memory of losing heart-connected Bibi.
Raised my memory of losing precious things.

What a day for me to feel real lost.

Evolution

Evolution

The word has many meanings.

It can be any process of formation or growth.

It can be something evolved.

In Biology, it can be the change in the genetic material of a population of organisms from generation to the next by processes as mutation, natural selection, and genetic drift.

In Mathematics,it can be the extraction of a root from a quantity.

In this blog, it is a change and progression of my way of blogging.

Reason of evolving?

Do i need one?

In facy, there are a few.

Somehow, i don't want my closed people to discover it.

Somehow, i don't want a specific person to read it.

Somehow, i can't express fully in the old one.

Somehow, i want to drop it down.

Somehow, i want to have a fresh approach.

So, hopefully, i can present nice pieces of thoughts here with contentment and delectation.

*A miao miao made this first post happened.